Couples

Take Care Of Your Relationship

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Think of the objects in your life that you are most careful around, the things towards which you are purposefully gentle, almost reverent. Whatever they are, you need to think of your romantic relationship as first place on the list, treating it even more carefully than you treat those objects.

Actually it’s utter insanity that some people come to devote more time and attention to some possession than they do to their most important human relationship, a relationship that can easily make the difference between happiness and unhappiness in life. But they come to take this person for granted, they start to use the relationship as a receptacle for all of their garbage, without realizing they need to be treating it just the same as if it were a delicate, beautiful flower that needs constant attention and just the right set of conditions to thrive.

When it’s obvious that your number one priority is the health of your relationship good things will happen. Your partner will surely respond in kind, maybe not right away but definitely as time goes by and your attitude becomes a constant. Mistakes you both make will be seen in a different light, not as proof of deficits but as temporary blips on a clean radar.

The idea that love and relationships shouldn’t be a lot of work is fine for storybooks but in the real world if you want good results you have to put in the effort to get them. A relationship is no different than any other life task in this regard. As Erich Fromm put it, “Love is not a spontaneous feeling, a thing that you fall into, but is something that requires thought, knowledge, care, giving, and respect.”

Greetings I'm Michael, the owner of Evolution Counseling and the author of all the articles on this site. I got my master's degree from Seattle University in community mental heath counseling and have committed myself to advancing my knowledge of psychology and to evolving my own philosophical system ever since. In addition to the content on this site I offer online coaching using Skype. If you'd like to learn more about it click on the online coaching tab or if you think you'd like to set up a session send me an email at evolve@evolutioncounseling.com.

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