
Existential Psychology
Autobots And Decepticons
Talking about the Transformers movies with kids and adolescents is an excellent way to set a positive trajectory for counseling right from the beginning. Most children have seen the movies and they can relate in an archetypal way to some of the existential themes and to traits of the main characters. The trick is to use this metaphor to help show the youth you are working with the true purpose of counseling and what human growth means.
Megatron, the leader of the Decepticons, is a classic example of an authoritarian character structure with sadistic tendencies. He demands obedience from those below him and uses intimidation, emotional abuse, and even violence to enforce it. He is highly concerned with loyalty yet he was the one responsible for the uprising and civil war on his home planet. He is destructive and relies on rationalizations for his actions to maintain psychic equilibrium, as all sadists do. His heart is twisted by his craving for power. What he really wants is subservience. He wants humans to become slaves. He wants to maintain these power imbalances forever.
Optimus Prime, the leader of the autobots, is completely different. He is concerned with truth and justice. When Megatron attempted to seize power by force Optimus and his companions fought back. It’s important to note that they did not fight back in order to maintain an unfair power structure in their society, but to protect a situation where all had the freedom to develop as unique individuals. Optimus is highly concerned with protecting humanity from the Decepticons. He does not act out of personal gain or the need for power, but instead out of a profound respect for the human condition and our need to be free. He cherishes the concepts of truth and existential freedom and seeks to protect them in others.
Decepticons and Autobots can both take the form of physical objects like cars, motorcycles, jet planes, or toasters, so identifying them is not easy. How can we always distinguish truth from lies? The answer is that we can’t, but investigating ourselves and all of the structures that surround us is a good place to start. Knowledge is essential because the Autobots and Decepticons have fundamentally different motivations for their behavior and different goals for humanity. Our client learns that one of the goals of counseling and life is to figure out which expectations and values are inhibiting mental health and which are maximizing it.
Counseling in this sort of metaphorical framework is not about eradicating problems. Instead it is the search for the truth. The quest set out before all of us is to confront life in order to develop into the fullest possible versions of ourselves. You cannot feel happy and whole unless you have had the opportunity to grow into the person you know you are deep down. There are countless blocks along the path.
That is why together we question everything during counseling. We have to find out who the Decepticons are and who the Autobots are. These might be teachers, society, politicians, a corporation, parents, television, religion, psychologists, or a part of ourselves. The list is different for every person based on unique needs, constitution, and situation. We try to honestly deconstruct any structure in a client’s life that transmits values consciously or unconsciously. This is a frightening and risky journey for a person of any age, and it is necessary that you pledge yourself to the cause of truth and justice in the counseling relationship in the same way that Optimus Prime pledges himself in the movies. Your support must be unwavering and known to be unwavering.
When kids come in with a list of problems following them they usually think that therapy is going to focus on eradicating those problems. They dread being told by yet another authority figure what they are doing wrong and how they need to change. However, in this context we are much more concerned with the conditions under which the child is trying to cope. Actually problems are proof that environmental surroundings are inadequate for existential needs. The fact that problems have arisen is quite positive because it means our client has not given up. Problems are symptoms of the conflict. If we focus on fixing the problems then we are delivering a damaging blow to healthy development and to instilling the courage necessary to face life honestly. If we focus on the path then counseling opens up into a journey of discovery that leads to increasing states of mental health and well-being.
When you think like this as a parent, teacher, or counselor you automatically begin questioning how you are transmitting values or beliefs to a child without really being aware of how they affect his or her sense of self and development. When you pledge yourself to the search for truth you tend to shine the spotlight on your own life and you grow in important ways. If you are going to use this metaphor I highly recommend that you watch the movies first and become knowledgeable about the mythology. Obviously in the search for truth you always want to be truthful, and kids can usually quickly spot when we are talking about something of theirs that we really don’t know anything about.
Related posts:
- Power From On High In every religion the same situation unfolds, which is that a priestly caste arises and begins to act as intermediary between gods and adherents. This caste becomes highly concerned with crystallizing all aspects of the religion, attempting to halt the organic and natural evolution of thought and practice that spawned that religion in the first […]...
- Authenticity And Values Life problems are rationalized on various plausible grounds in order to escape conscious awareness of the painful truth behind what’s actually causing them, which can simply be boiled down to living a life that feels inauthentic. We would define authenticity as having the courage to isolate and unfold one’s unique potentialities and using the values […]...
- Why So Serious In Counseling People thinking about going to counseling often have a preconceived notion that the therapy process will be a grim and serious endeavor. Actually many counselors cultivate the image and probably do spend the majority of sessions straight faced and inhabiting a role of what they believe to be professional. One of the popular refrains I […]...
- Accepting Criticism Accepting criticism, even when it’s constructive and sincerely meant for our betterment, can be really difficult to do. Many of us find ourselves shutting down, rejecting what is being said before even taking the time to seriously consider whether or not there is an element of truth. Depending on the circumstances criticism can be utilized […]...
- Life Is Not A Movie Most of us believe we’re the protagonists in this thing called life. We wade through the world, bumping up against some people, moving along with others, all the while considering each and every one of them to be secondary characters in a movie where we’ve got the lead role. They all return the favor of […]...
- Silent Rebellion Any time you are confronted with a behavior that on the surface seems destructive or against a person’s best interests, you’ve got to consider whether an unhealthy power imbalance might be in play. Power relationships define Western culture. Parents and children, teachers and students, bosses and employees, very often husbands and wives or vice versa. […]...
- Sometimes Listening is Better Than Giving Advice You learn pretty quickly in the counseling situation that sometimes what clients remember and appreciate was your compassionate listening, your presence as they hashed out problems themselves, although you thought it was your brilliant insight into those problems that would garner the most points. Sometimes listening is better than giving advice, and this holds true […]...
- Walk Your Own Path “No one can construct for you the bridge upon which precisely you must cross the stream of life, no one but you yourself alone.” – Frederick Nietzsche Subordination in all its forms is usually cast in a negative light but the truth is that most of us are desperate to subordinate ourselves in some way […]...
- Seeking Help For Life Problems There are many people who have reached an impasse with their life problems and have decided on their own that getting professional help is the logical next step, but this doesn’t mean they go out and get it. In fact the vast majority don’t, and it’s not necessarily due to the stigma attached to mental […]...
- Eradicating The Racist Mind And Retaining Personal Freedom Psychologically speaking, conversations and ideas meant to eradicate the racist mindset are problematic because the attitude of wanting to eradicate anything is militaristic, or at least perceived that way. It sets up two opposing camps, one hell-bent on maintaining the status quo, the other hell-bent on changing it, and this pressure results in increasingly entrenched […]...
- Trying to Possess Someone “Caring for but never trying to own may be a further way to define friendship.” – William Glasser Glasser makes the incisive point in one of his books that if you think of your longest lasting and healthiest relationships they are probably with friends, and what separates the way you relate to friends with the […]...
- Why People Create Problems Where There Are None Have you ever noticed how some people, when suddenly confronted with the absence of any observable conflict, take it upon themselves to create problems where there are none? They’ll start to harp on small issues that wouldn’t have warranted a second thought when times were tough. How could it be that the moment they’re finally […]...
- Instilling Change Many in the helping professions express some variation of the idea that their job is to instill a more appropriate set of values and a better philosophical outlook on life, to counteract all of the negative thinking and behavior patterns that were instilled by a client’s family of origin or by society. This outlook makes […]...
- Transformation In Counseling As a counselor, if you aren’t conscious of the unconscious pull your clients feel to use you as a garbage receptacle for unwanted, uncomfortable, dangerous thoughts and feelings you’re going to run into problems because you and your clients will live two different realities during counseling exchanges. You’re trained to appreciate the communication of private […]...
- Going It Alone I often get asked by people struggling with life issues if therapy is really necessary or if they can find the solution to their problems on their own. This is a complicated question and the answer is that it depends. What it really comes down to is the quality of the therapeutic relationship and the […]...
- Try Something New If you’ve grown bored in your life, if you feel like every day is pretty much just like the last, if you’ve become a little jaded with your situation and the human condition in general, ask yourself this question. “When was the last time I tried something new?” Settling into a predictable routine has its […]...
- The Leap of Faith in Therapy Changing in Ways Big and Small Deciding to go to therapy is very much a leap of faith. At the most fundamental human level it’s a leap of faith because the whole point of therapy is to change in ways big and small, and there’s no way to know how life will be, how you’ll […]...
- Guilt And Responsibility A common sentiment amongst the educated elite is that guilt is a superficial construct employed by the various power structures, particularly organized religions, to gain and maintain control over the thoughts and actions of the masses. The trick these power structures pull off is to turn something external and unreal into something that’s internally experienced […]...
- Active Listening Primary narcissism is probably the biggest reason that real communication breaks down. Many consider listening to be a passive state and are really just waiting to pounce on any opportunity to shift the focus back onto themselves. They don’t take the time to process what is being communicated and their goal is definitely not to […]...
- People Who Constantly Point Out Deficiencies In Others People who constantly point out deficiencies in their partners and other intimates tend to fancy themselves as problem free, as sort of the unofficial therapists of the situation who are only trying to help. What they fail to recognize is that they have big unaddressed problems too and that focusing on the other is an […]...
