Existential Psychology

Getting Through The Rocky Periods Of Life

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Challenging The Non-Change Bias

Life is full of ups and downs but many of us fall into what we might call the non-change bias. While in the midst of being ‘up’ we think we’ll be up forever and while in the midst of being ‘down’ we think we’ll be down forever.

So really getting through the rocky periods of life starts with consciously distancing ourselves from the narcissistic bias of non-change. We can gently remind ourselves that ‘this too shall pass’. Just like we wanted the good times to stay around forever and they didn’t the bad times will likely once again make way for the good.

Sometimes the necessary changes to get things back on track are within our locus of control and sometimes they aren’t but either way we put ourselves in a better position to weather the storm when we remember that non-change is an illusion, permanence is an illusion.¬†

Impermanence is the Rule of Existence 

Change and impermanence are the rules of existence and the rules of human life. These insights can help us from sinking into despair and hopelessness when things aren’t going our way. The vicious cycle that occurs to many of us when we’re going through a rocky period of life is that we unknowingly contribute to its intensity and duration due to our own pessimistic attitudes and behaviors. We’re not in a state of readiness where we can notice and embrace various opportunities around us but in a state of passivity or even worse negativity where we’re destructive towards ourselves, others, and the world.

Cultivating a State of Readiness

So again cultivating a state of readiness where we can see and embrace various opportunities that will get us out of the funk we’re in starts with ditching the non-change bias. Even if there’s not a thing we can do to influence the situation external conditions will eventually change on their own anyway, and remembering that will help us better bear up under unwanted conditions.